Okay, what just happened? It was as if club football realised that it was going on a fortnight's break starting Monday and decided to go full pelt on the drama. A stunned By The Numbers brings you the best numbers of a properly madcap weekend of football:
Where do we begin? Aston Villa 7 (SEVEN) - Liverpool 2? Manchester United 1 - Tottenham Hotspur 6 (SIX)? Leicester City 0 - 3 West Ham United? Leeds 1 - 1 Manchester City? It truly was a bonkers weekend, one in which Chelsea keeping a clean sheet (4-0 v Crystal Palace) was relatively not strange at all. Oh, also, Arsenal beat Sheffield United 2-1.
We begin, though, with the league leaders:
The goal by Yerry Mina for Everton (assisted by James Rodríguez) was the first goal in Premier League history to be both scored and assisted by a Colombian. It was the second of Everton's four as they thumped Brighton 4-2.
Leeds' Rodrigo Moreno scored his second PL goal as Leeds held Manchester City. It was his first since January 2011, nine years and 272 days ago. That is the second-longest gap between a player's first two goals in the PL after Andy Johnson (9 years, 276 days).
Manchester United have lost their first two home league games of a season for the first time since 1986-87.
Manchester United have conceded six goals in a single Premier League game for only the third time. The remarkable thing? All the results have come in October (1996 vs. Southampton, 2011 vs. Manchester City, 2020 vs. Tottenham).
The last time a visiting side scored four goals in the first half in a league game at Manchester United were..Spurs themselves, in November 1957 (they won 4-3).
In the PL era, only two defending champions have conceded four goals in the first half of a league match - Leicester City vs. Manchester United (2016-17) and Liverpool vs. Aston Villa (2020).
Jose Mourinho's Tottenham have equalled the biggest-ever margin of victory (6-1) for a manager vs. a former club in the PL. They are tied with Brendan Rodgers' Liverpool, who beat Swansea 5-0 in February 2013.
Just how much do Liverpool miss their first-choice keeper? Well, second-choice Adrian has made five errors directly leading to opposition goals in his 21 appearances for Liverpool in all competitions. That's as many as Alisson has made in 92 matches.
The two most storied clubs in the land have had a rather ignominious chapter added to their histories. This is the first time that both Liverpool and Manchester United have conceded (at least) six goals in a match on the same day.
The last English top-flight defending champion to concede seven goals in a league match was Arsenal, against Sunderland in September 1953.
This is also the first time that Liverpool have conceded seven goals in a game since April 1963, when they lost 7-2 to Tottenham Hotspur.
Harry Kane has now been directly involved in nine goals in the PL this season (three goals, six assists); only Thierry Henry in 2004/05 had a hand in more in the opening four games of a campaign (10).
Son Heung-Min and Harry Kane have combined for 26 PL goals, the fifth-most of any duo in PL history and the most by any currently active duo.
Only Liverpool (34) have won more home PL points than Arsenal (29) since Mikel Arteta's first home game in charge last December.
Mohamed Salah has now scored against 25 of the 26 sides he has appeared against in the Premier League for Liverpool (96%) - the best ratio of any player in the competition for the club.
The last time Everton won their opening seven games of a season in all competitions was in 1894-95 -- 126 years ago! This is also the first time they have won seven consecutive matches (at any stage) since April 1987.
Roma registered their first official win of the campaign, 1-0 vs Udinese. AC Milan strolled past Spezia 3-0. Atalanta walloped Cagliari 5-2. An ill-tempered affair saw Inter Milan and Lazio share a goal and a red card each. Juventus, meanwhile, will be declared 3-0 winners, without a ball being kicked -- with their opponents Napoli sat about 900km away in Naples, unable to travel due to quarantine restrictions.
AC Milan are the first team in Europe's top five Leagues to play with seven starters (in a single match) born after 1/1/1999.
Milan really are on a roll. They have won the first three games of a Serie A season without conceding a single goal for just the third time in their history, after 1971/72 (under Nereo Rocco) and 1952/53 (with Mario Sperone).
No team in Serie A were as exciting as Atalanta last season, and that remains true so far this season around as well. They are the first team in the history of the league to have scored 4+ goals in each of the first three matches of the season. The last side to do that in Europe's top 5 leagues was Real Madrid in 1987/88.
Lazio have gained the most points (20) from losing positions in 2020 in Europe's top five leagues.
This is the first time in their history that Atletico have drawn two of their opening three games with a 0-0 scoreline.
Karim Benzema is now the fifth player in Real Madrid history to score 250+ goals in all competitions, after Cristiano Ronaldo (450), Raul Gonzalez (323), Alfredo di Stefano (308) and Carlos 'Santillana' Alonso (290).
Borussia Dortmund and RB Leipzig dismissed SC Freiburg and Schalke respectively 4-0, while (surprise) early leaders Augbsurg were held 0-0 at Wolfsburg. The match of the weekend, though, saw Bayern Munich beat Hertha Berlin 4-3. Guess who got all four goals?
This is the third time Lewandowski has scored 4+ goals in a single match for Bayern and the first time in the Bundesliga since his five-goal performance against Wolfsburg in September 2015.
Over the last 11 Bundesliga seasons, there have been 10 instances of a player scoring 4+ goals in a single match -- Lewandowski is the only player to have done so multiple times.
Lewandowski got there by trying and trying and trying -- he is, in fact, the first player since Edin Dzeko in December 2009 (for Wolfsburg against Freiburg) to have had 13 shots in a single Bundesliga match.
Lewandowski has now scored 100 goals in the Bundesliga for Bayern Munich at the Allianz Arena, their home stadium.
For once, nothing.
(Stats courtesy: ESPN Stats and Information Group)